2. Jason bē-tàng ōaⁿ chiu-boa̍t
"Kho-ha̍k gián-kiù boeh án-nóa?"
"Chhap-siâu i siáⁿ kho-ha̍k gián-kiù." Ivan chē tī bîn-chhn̂g teh chhēng ê-á. I chin gâu chhēng-chhah, sī sêng-kong ê cha-po͘-lâng, sīm-chì khó-lêng mā chin bô-chêng. Góa chīn-liōng mài siūⁿ che siūⁿ siuⁿ chē, m̄-koh sim-ni̍h koh siūⁿ tio̍h chèng-kì. Sìn-siuⁿ ni̍h chi̍t-tiuⁿ ok-chit ê bô-miâ ê phe. Chi̍t-lia̍p ùi thâu-chêng thang-á khian ji̍p-lâi ê chio̍h-thâu. Iáu-koh-ū in hāu-seⁿ Jason, che sī i ê chêng-bó͘ seⁿ ê gín-á, chi̍t kò goe̍h lâi goán tau tòa chi̍t-ê chiu-boa̍t. Chāi góa khòaⁿ, chit-ê gín-á ná-chhiūⁿ ok-mô͘. M̄-koh he khó-lêng hām Ivan bô koan-hē. Cha̍p-saⁿ hòe chóng-sī pháiⁿ kà ê nî-kí.
"Góa í-keng bé hó lán ê ki-phiò ah." góa kā sêng-jīn.
"Oke, lí nā kah-ì tō hó," Ivan kóng, ná chhēng i ê gōa-thò ná kiâⁿ óa góa, kō͘ siang-chhiú lám góa. "Án-ne lán tō tâng-chê khì." Góa tòe i lo̍h-lâu. Kàu tōa-thiaⁿ ê sî, i kōaⁿ khí i ê kong-sū-pau, tī hia̍h-thâu kă chim chi̍t-ē, tō kiâⁿ chhut tōa-mn̂g. Góa chhēng e̍k-phâu khiā tī mn̂g-kháu, ná-chhiūⁿ 1950 nî-tāi ê ka-têng chú-hū án-ne kā ia̍t-chhiú. "Khà tiān-ōe hō͘ Lana," i oa̍t-thâu hoah, "kā yi kóng siông-sè."
Che sī góa kah-ì ê sî-chūn, iā tō sī Ivan tú chhut-mn̂g khì siōng-pan ê sî-chūn. Góa kah-ì goán chit-keng tōa-chhù, kū ê tēng-chhâ tē-pán chiò tio̍h ji̍t-thâu ná-chhiūⁿ phang-bit siám-kng. Góa kah-ì kheh-thiaⁿ hit-cho͘ 8,000 bí-kim ê phòng-í, ū kāu-kāu ê ú-jiông chē-thiap, í-bīn sī thian-gô-jiông ê chng-thāⁿ. Góa kah-ì tōa-thiaⁿ hit-chiah goán khǹg sìn-kiāⁿ ê bo̍k-tāu-bo̍k (牧豆木, mesquite) chhâ-toh. Góa kah-ì góa ē-tàng tan-to̍k hiáng-siū chiah-ê, chai-iaⁿ bô sáⁿ, bô jīm-hô mi̍h-kiāⁿ ē phò-hoāi goán ê seng-oa̍h. Goán ê an-choân, sù-sī, khoài-lo̍k ê seng-oa̍h. Hit-kang khah òaⁿ liáu-āu, góa khà tiān-ōe hō͘ Ivan ê pì-su Lana, kā yi kóng boeh khì Fresno ê hêng-têng. Lana tī góa iáu m̄-bat Ivan í-chêng tō khai-sí hū-chek Ivan ê ji̍t-têng an-pâi, m̄-koán sī siong-bū siōng ê a̍h sī siā-kau siōng ê.
"Hit-ê chiu-boa̍t i tio̍h hām Jason chò-hóe," yi kóng.
"Sáⁿ-siâu."
"Lí tio̍h ka-tī khì."
"Góa bô-ài ka-tī khì," góa kóng. Bóe ah, siūⁿ-bē-kàu góa soah kóng, "góa boeh hō͘ i kìⁿ goán sió-mōe. Jason kám bē-sái ōaⁿ chi̍t-ê chiu-boa̍t?"
"Jason bē-tàng ōaⁿ chiu-boa̍t."
"Lí khak-tēng?"
"Ko͘-chui-ê," Lana ah-kē siaⁿ-im kóng, "lí tio̍h khòaⁿ in ê lī-hun tông-ì-su, tn̂g-ló-ló ná-chhiūⁿ tiān-ōe-phō͘-á."
"Oh," góa kóng. He góa siūⁿ ē-kàu. Góa mā ū tha̍k kòe góa ê kiat-hun hia̍p-gī-su. "Án-ne goán boeh án-nóa?"
"Kă kóng lín ê hâng-pan hō-má," Lana ìn kóng, "góa lâi thè Jason mā bé chi̍t-tiuⁿ ki-phiò."
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*
2. Jason 袂當換週末
"科學研究欲 án-nóa?"
"Chhap-siâu 伊啥科學研究." Ivan 坐 tī 眠床 teh 穿鞋仔. 伊真 gâu 穿插, 是成功 ê 查埔人, 甚至可能 mā 真無情. 我盡量莫想這想 siuⁿ 濟, m̄-koh 心 ni̍h koh 想著證據. 信箱 ni̍h 一張惡質 ê 無名 ê 批. 一粒 ùi 頭前窗仔 khian 入來 ê 石頭. 猶 koh 有 in 後生 Jason, 這是伊 ê 前某生 ê 囡仔, 一個月來阮兜蹛一个週末. 在我看, 這个囡仔 ná 像惡魔. M̄-koh 彼可能和 Ivan 無關係. 十三歲總是歹教 ê 年紀.
"我已經買好咱 ê 機票 ah." 我 kā 承認.
"Oke, 你若佮意 tō 好," Ivan 講, ná 穿伊 ê 外套 ná 行倚我, kō͘ 雙手攬我. "Án-ne 咱 tō 同齊去." 我綴伊落樓. 到大廳 ê 時, 伊捾起伊 ê 公事包, tī 額頭 kă 唚一下, tō 行出大門. 我穿浴袍徛 tī 門口, ná 像 1950 年代 ê 家庭主婦 án-ne kā 擛手. "敲電話予 Lana," 伊越頭喝, "kā 她講詳細."
這是我佮意 ê 時陣, 也 tō 是 Ivan 拄出門去上班 ê 時陣. 我佮意阮這間大厝, 舊 ê tēng 柴地板照著日頭 ná 像蜂蜜閃光. 我佮意客廳彼組 8,000 美金 ê 膨椅, 有厚厚 ê 羽絨坐 thiap, 椅面是天鵝絨 ê 妝 thāⁿ. 我佮意大廳彼隻阮囥信件 ê bo̍k-tāu-bo̍k (牧豆木, mesquite) 柴桌. 我佮意我會當單獨享受 chiah-ê, 知影無啥, 無任何物件會破壞阮 ê 生活. 阮 ê 安全, 四序, 快樂 ê 生活. 彼工較晏了後, 我敲電話予 Ivan ê 祕書 Lana, kā 她講欲去 Fresno ê 行程. Lana tī 我猶 m̄-bat Ivan 以前 tō 開始負責 Ivan ê 日程安排, 毋管是商務上 ê a̍h 是社交上 ê.
"彼个週末伊著和 Jason 做伙," 她講.
"Sáⁿ-siâu."
"你著 ka-tī 去."
"我無愛 ka-tī 去," 我講. 尾 ah, 想袂到我煞講, "我欲予伊見阮小妹. Jason 敢袂使換一个週末?"
"Jason 袂當換週末."
"你確定?"
"古錐 ê," Lana 壓低聲音講, "你著看 in ê 離婚同意書, 長 ló-ló ná 像電話簿仔."
"Oh," 我講. He 我想會到. 我 mā 有讀過我 ê 結婚協議書. "Án-ne 阮欲 án-nóa?"
"Kă 講恁 ê 航班號碼," Lana 應講, "我來替 Jason mā 買一張機票."
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*
2.
"What about science?"
"Fuck science." Ivan sits on the bed and puts on his shoes. A well-dressed man, a successful man, maybe even a little ruthless. I try not to think about that too much, but I come across the evidence. A nasty, anonymous letter in the mailbox. A stone through the front window. And then there's his son, Jason, from his previous marriage, who stays over with us one weekend a month. He is, as far as I can tell, a complete monster. But maybe this has nothing to do with Ivan. Thirteen is never a good age.
"I already bought us plane tickets," I confess.
"Okay, if that's what you really want," says Ivan, putting his jacket on, then coming closer and putting his arm around me. "We'll go together." I follow him down the stairs. In the hall he picks up his briefcase, kisses me on the forehead, and sails out the front door. I stand in the doorway in my bathrobe, waving like a nineteen-fifties housewife. "Call Lana," he yells back, "and let her know the details."
This is the moment I love, right after Ivan leaves for work. I love our big house with the old hardwood floors that gleam like honey in the sunlight. I love the eight thousand dollar couch in the living room, with its thick down cushions and velvet upholstery. I love the mesquite wood table in the hall where we pile our mail. I love having it all to myself and knowing that nothing, nothing can ruin our life. Our safe, comfortable, happy life. Later in the day, I call Lana, Ivan's secretary, and tell her about the trip to Fresno. Lana keeps Ivan's schedule, business and social, and has since before we met.
"He has Jason that weekend," she says.
"Shit."
"So go by yourself."
"I don't want to go by myself," I say. And then, to my surprise, I say, "I want him to meet my sister. Can't Jason switch weekends?"
"Jason cannot switch weekends."
"Are you sure?"
"Honey," Lana lowers her voice, "you should see the divorce agreement. It's like a phone book."
"Oh," I say. I can well imagine. I have, after all, seen my prenuptial. "Then what should we do?"
"Give me your flight number," replies Lana, "I'll get Jason a ticket too."
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*
