4. Ko͘-niû kui-sin khek móa pi-ai
"Ū-ê Sò͘-ha̍k-ka siau-tî thòng-khó͘, goán tiong-kan ū-ê hoa̍t-lo̍h hū-bīn ê chêng-sū, m̄-koh goán lóng ū teh siu-lí lâng ê hong-thêng-sek. Siōng ióng-kám ê lâng" -- yi kā ba̍k-chiu nih chi̍t-ē -- "bat chhì iōng Kong-sek lâi hō͘ lâng ê sin-khu tùi-khòng tiōng-le̍k, thang chìn-hêng sin-thé oa̍h-tāng, chhin-chhiūⁿ kóng hui-hêng."
Choân-pan lóng chhiò kah ki-ki kiò, hit-ê poa̍h-lo̍h ê lâng tī in ê kì-tî iáu chin sin.
"Furcal ê Kong-sek tāi-piáu ū chi̍t-kang, siōng chhong-bêng ê lâng ē-tàng chiáng-ak tio̍h kui-ê ú-tiū ê lí-lō͘."
In lóng lé-māu sèng phah-pho̍k-á.
Hāu-tiúⁿ ùi piⁿ-á chhut-lâi chú-chhî thê būn-tê. Tú khai-sí ê būn-tê lóng siūⁿ ē-kàu, mā lóng sī gōng būn-tê. "Lí ē-tàng hō͘ lâng tūi-lo̍h ài-hô bô?" Bē. "Lí ē-tàng hō͘ lâng ún-sin bô?" Bē. Nkem Ozechi khó-lêng kám-kak pháiⁿ-sè, in ê būn-tê hām khah chha ê ha̍k-hāu ha̍k-seng só͘ mn̄g ê bô siáⁿ chha-pia̍t. Āu-lâi, mā sī siūⁿ ē-kàu, ū-lâng thê-chhut chi̍t-ê m̄-sī būn-tê ê būn-tê.
"Lí teh chò ê, m̄-tio̍h." Lâi chū chi̍t-ê sán kah ná tek-ko, chhùi-khí tōa-pán ê cha-po͘ gín-á. Sui-bóng sán, i ū un-jiû ê chi̍t-bīn, khòaⁿ khí-lâi chin siū théng-sēng.
Nneoma gia̍h chhiú chó͘-chí Nkem Ozechi chhap-ōe. Yi ū hoat-tō͘ hoa̍t-lo̍h che. "Kái-soeh chi̍t-ē."
"Hmh, goán lāu-pē kóng, lín chiah-ê lâng teh chò ê, m̄-tio̍h, lín bô eng-kai chó͘-chí chi̍t-ê lâng chū-jiân kám-siū tio̍h ê khùn-lân. He chiah sī chò lâng ê ì-gī."
Āu-piah ū lâng khai-sí phah-pho̍k-á, Nneoma koh gia̍h-chhiú àm-sī an-chēng. Yi gián-kiù hit-ê gín-á-hiaⁿ, chù-ì tio̍h i ê chhiú-ba̍k, chai-iáⁿ in lāu-pē ê chit-gia̍p (lu̍t-su), i ê kai-kip (tē-it). Yi bat piān kòe chē-chē chhiūⁿ in lāu-pē hit-chióng lâng, in seng-oa̍h sù-sī, in tú kòe ê khùn-lân phó͘-thong, hó chhú-lí, tō káⁿ kā in ê sió khùn-lân the̍h lâi hām chhim long-long ê tōa khùn-kéng sio pí-phēng.
"Lín lāu-pē hām hiah-ê tī gōa-bīn khòng-gī ê lâng, m̄-chai siáⁿ sī chin-chiàⁿ ê thòng-khó͘. Tùi góa lâi kóng, in tùi chit-ê tāi-chì ê kám-kak bô-hāu. Góa bē khì mn̄g bô chhì chia̍h hit-lō͘ chhài ê lâng, kám su-iàu ke kóa iâm."
Gín-á-hiaⁿ chē leh, siang-chhiú lám tī heng-chêng, chhùi tū-tū. Yi bô kái-piàn i ê koan-liām, hit-chióng lâng lí éng-oán to chò bē-kàu, m̄-koh yi í-keng hō͘ i tiām khì ah.
Tī sòa lo̍h ê tiām-chēng tiong-kan, lēng-gōa chi̍t-ki chhiú gia̍h khí-lâi. Mài sī yi, Nneoma siūⁿ, mài sī yi. Chū-chiông yi kiâⁿ-ji̍p kàu-sek, yi tō chhì boeh mài chhap hit-ê ko͘-niû. Yi bián khòaⁿ yi ê chhiú-ba̍k tō chai hit-ê ko͘-niû sī Senegal lâng, bat siū tio̍h Siau-bia̍t ūn-tōng ê éng-hióng. Yi kui-sin lóng khek móa chit-chióng pi-ai.
"Só͘-í, lí ē-tàng hō͘ he siau-sit?" Yin khó-lêng sī pâng-keng nih ûi-it ê nn̄g-lâng.
"Tio̍h, góa ē-tàng." Ūi-tio̍h thâi-tiāu hit-ê chhut-hiān-tiong ê hi-bāng, "M̄-koh, he sī chi̍t-ê ko-tō͘ koán-chè koh chin kùi ê kòe-têng. Tōa pō͘-hūn góa ê kheh-hō͘ lóng tit-tio̍h in ê chèng-hú ê tāi-liōng pó͘-thiap, sīm-chì án-ne mā kāng-khoán." Ūi-tio̍h hông-chí iáu-ū jīm-hô hi-bāng, "Lí tio̍h ài sī chi̍t-ê kong-bîn."
Ko͘-niû kā ba̍k-chiu khòaⁿ-kē tī kha-thúi, ba̍k-sái kâm tī ba̍k-kîⁿ. Bē-su sī khau-sé, yi ê piⁿ-á piah-téng ū chi̍t-pak tē-tô͘, hián-chhut 70-nî chêng kap taⁿ ê tē-kiû. Kòe-khì ê tōa pō͘-hūn Pak Bí-chiu í-keng khàm chúi, Europa mā piàn-chò chi̍t-phiàn hái. Rosia sī chi̍t-ê im-chúi ê bōng-tiûⁿ. Lóng bô a̍h pō͘-hūn bô im-chúi ê só͘-chāi sī Australia hām kòe-khì ê Afrika, taⁿ kiò-chò Liân-ha̍p Kok-ka. Tī Franse lâng tit-tio̍h chú-lâng sìn-jīm, ū té-chām hô-pêng liáu-āu, Siau-bia̍t ūn-tōng tō khai-sí ah. Thê-chhut kéng-kò ê Senegal pò-chóa hông tòng-chò sī im-bô͘-lūn, sī chè-chō mâ-hoân ê o͘-a-chhùi. M̄-koh, āu-lâi ê kok-chióng iâⁿ-tē, tu̍t-kek, sîn-pì pēⁿ-chèng téng-téng hāi-sí kúi-ā pah-bān lâng. Lāi-koh sêng-oân tī bîn-chhn̂g téng pī bô͘-sat. Hit-ê ko͘-niû oa̍h lo̍h-lâi. Lâi-kàu chia, lâi-kàu chit-ê thê-kiong hō͘ liû-lōng jî-tông hán-kiàn chióng-ha̍k-kim ê ha̍k-hāu, Hit-ê ko͘-niû tiāⁿ-tio̍h keng-le̍k chióng-chióng siūⁿ bē-kàu ê tāi-chì. Yi ê pi-siong siuⁿ-kòe tîm-tāng, Nneoma lī-khui kàu-sek, Nkem Ozechi tòe chhut-lâi, kín piàng-piàng tòe tī yi āu-bīn.
"Hoān-sè in tiong-kan ū-lâng ē chiâⁿ-chò Sò͘-ha̍k-ka, ná chhiūⁿ lí."
Nneoma su-iàu chéng-lí chi̍t-ē. Khòaⁿ tio̍h ū cha-bó͘ hòa-chong-sek ê phiau-chì, yi sûi hoa̍h ji̍p-khì, tī Nkem Ozechi bīn-chêng hut-leh pàng khui hàiⁿ-mn̂g. Chiah-ê gín-á tiong-kan bô-lâng ē chiâⁿ-chò Sò͘-ha̍k-ka; kàu-sek bô pòaⁿ-ê thian-châi, tō ná-chhiūⁿ kui chúi-tî ê hî-á.
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4. 姑娘規身刻滿悲哀
"有 ê 數學家消除痛苦, 阮中間有 ê 發落負面 ê 情緒, 毋過阮攏有 teh 修理人 ê 方程式. 上勇敢 ê 人" -- 她 kā 目睭 nih 一下 -- "捌試用公式來予人 ê 身軀對抗重力, 通進行身體活動, 親像講飛行."
全班攏笑甲 ki-ki 叫, 彼个跋落 ê 人 tī in ê 記持猶真新.
"Furcal ê 公式代表有一工, 上聰明 ê 人會當掌握著規个宇宙 ê 理路."
In 攏禮貌性拍噗仔.
校長 ùi 邊仔出來主持提問題. 拄開始 ê 問題攏想會到, mā 攏是戇問題. "你會當予人墜落愛河無?" 袂. "你會當予人隱身無?" 袂. Nkem Ozechi 可能感覺歹勢, in ê 問題和較差 ê 學校學生所問 ê 無啥差別. 後來, mā 是想會到, 有人提出一个毋是問題 ê 問題.
"你 teh 做 ê, 毋著." 來自一个瘦甲 ná 竹篙, 喙齒大板 ê 查埔囡仔. 雖罔瘦, 伊有溫柔 ê 一面, 看起來真受寵倖.
Nneoma 攑手阻止 Nkem Ozechi 插話. 她有法度發落這. "解說一下."
"Hmh, 阮老爸講, 恁 chiah-ê 人 teh 做 ê, 毋著, 恁無應該阻止一个人自然感受著 ê 困難. 彼才是做人 ê 意義."
後壁有人開始拍噗仔, Nneoma koh 攑手暗示安靜. 她研究彼个囡仔兄, 注意著伊 ê 手目, 知影 in 老爸 ê 職業 (律師), 伊 ê 階級 (第一). 她捌辯過濟濟像 in 老爸彼種人, in 生活四序, in 拄過 ê 困難普通, 好處理, 就敢 kā in ê 小困難提來和深 long-long ê 大困境相比並.
"恁老爸和 hiah-ê tī 外面抗議 ê 人, 毋知啥是真正 ê 痛苦. 對我來講, in 對這个代誌 ê 感覺無效. 我袂去問無試食彼路菜 ê 人, 敢需要加寡鹽."
囡仔兄坐 leh, 雙手攬 tī 胸前, 喙 tū-tū. 她無改變伊 ê 觀念, 彼種人你永遠 to 做袂到, 毋過她已經予伊恬去 ah.
Tī 紲落 ê 恬靜中間, 另外一支手攑起來. 莫是她, Nneoma 想, 莫是她. 自從她行入教室, 她就試欲莫 chhap 彼个姑娘. 她免看她 ê 手目就知彼个姑娘是 Senegal 人, 捌受著 "消滅" 運動 ê 影響. 她規身攏刻滿這種悲哀.
"所以, 你會當予彼消失?" 姻可能是房間 nih 唯一 ê 兩人.
"著, 我會當." 為著刣掉彼个出現中 ê 希望, "毋過, 彼是一个高度管制 koh 真貴 ê 過程. 大部份我 ê 客戶攏得著 in ê 政府 ê 大量補貼, 甚至 án-ne mā 仝款." 為著防止猶有任何希望, "你著愛是一个公民."
姑娘 kā 目睭看低 tī 跤腿, 目屎含 tī 目墘. 袂輸是剾洗, 她 ê 邊仔壁頂有一幅地圖, 顯出 70 年前 kap 今 ê 地球. 過去 ê 大部份北美洲已經崁水, Europa mā 變做一遍海. Rosia 是一个淹水 ê 墓場. 攏無 a̍h 部份無淹水 ê 所在是 Australia 和過去 ê Afrika, 今叫做聯合國家. Tī Franse 人得著主人信任, 有短站和平了後, 消滅運動就開始 ah. 提出警告 ê Senegal 報紙 hông 當做是陰謀論, 是製造麻煩 ê 烏鴉喙. 毋過, 後來 ê 各種營地, 突擊, 神祕病症等等害死幾若百萬人. 內閣成員 tī 眠床頂被謀殺. 彼个姑娘活落來. 來到遮, 來到這个提供予流浪兒童罕見獎學金 ê 學校, 彼个姑娘定著經歷種種想袂到 ê 代誌. 她 ê 悲傷 siuⁿ 過沉重, Nneoma 離開教室, Nkem Ozechi 綴出來, 緊乓乓綴 tī 她後面.
"凡勢 in 中間有人會成做數學家, 若像你."
Nneoma 需要整理一下. 看著有查某化妝室 ê 標誌, 她隨伐入去, tī Nkem Ozechi 面前忽 leh 放開幌門. Chiah-ê 囡仔中間無人會成做數學家; 教室無半个天才, 就若像規水池 ê 魚仔.
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4.
“Some Mathematicians remove pain, some of us deal in negative emotions, but we all fix the equation of a person. The bravest”—she winked—“have tried their head at using the Formula to make the human body defy gravity, for physical endeavors, like flight.”
The class giggled, the fallen man fresh in their minds.
“Furcal’s Formula means that one day the smartest people can access the very fabric of the universe.”
They applauded politely.
The headmaster stepped from the corner to moderate questions. The first were predictable and stupid. “Can you make people fall in love?” No. “Can you make someone become invisible?” No. Nkem Ozechi might have been embarrassed to know that their questions were no different from the children in the lower schools. Then (again predictably) someone posed a non-question.
“What you are doing is wrong.” From a reed-thin boy with large teeth. Despite his thinness there was softness to him, a pampered look.
Nneoma put her hand up to stop Nkem Ozechi from interrupting. She could handle this. “Explain.”
“Well, my dad says what you people do is wrong, that you shouldn’t be stopping a person from feeling natural hardships. That’s what it means to be human.”
Someone in the back started to clap until Nneoma again raised her hand for silence. She studied the boy and noted on his wrist his father’s occupation (lawyer), his class (first). She’d argued down many a person like his father, people who’d lived easy lives, who’d had moderate but manageable difficulties then dared to compare their meager hardship with unfathomable woes.
“Your father and those people protesting outside have no concept of what real pain is. As far as I’m concerned their feelings on this matter are invalid. I would never ask a person who hasn’t tasted a dish whether it needs more salt.”
The boy sat with his arms crossed, pouting. She hadn’t changed his mind, you never could with people like that, but she’d shut him up.
In the quiet that followed another hand raised. Not her, Nneoma thought, not her. She’d been trying to ignore the girl since she walked into the classroom. She didn’t need to look at her wrist to know that the girl was Senegalese, and had been affected by the Elimination. It was etched all over her, this sorrow.
“So you can make it go away?” They could have been the only two people in the room.
“Yes, I can.” And to kill the dawning hope, “But it is a highly regulated and very expensive process. Most of my clients are heavily subsidized by their governments, but even then.” And in case any hope remained, “You have to be a citizen.”
The girl lowered her eyes to her lap, fighting tears. As though to mock her, she was flanked by a map on the wall, the entire globe splayed out as it had been seventy years ago and as it was now. Most of what had been North America was covered in water and a sea had replaced Europe. Russia was a soaked grave. The only continents unclaimed in whole or in part by the sea were Australia and what was now the United Countries but had once been Africa. The Elimination began after a moment of relative peace, after the French had won the trust of their hosts. The Senegalese newspapers that issued warnings were dismissed as conspiracy rags, rabble-rousers inventing trouble. But then the camps, the raids, and the mysterious illness that wiped out millions. Then the cabinet members murdered in their beds. And the girl had survived it. To be here, at a school like this on one of the rare scholarships they offered to displaced children, the girl must have lived through the unthinkable. The weight of her mourning was too much and Nneoma left the room, followed by Nkem Ozechi who clicked hurriedly behind her.
“Maybe some of them will be Mathematicians, like you.”
Nneoma needed to gather herself. She saw the sign for the ladies room and stepped inside, swinging the door in Nkem Ozechi’s face. None of those children would ever be Mathematicians; the room was as bare of genius as a pool of fish.
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